This morning feels surreal, at best. At worst, intimidating…like the still-peaceful beginning of a nightmare. Impending…“something wicked this way comes”. Don’t tell me I’m being paranoid, I’ve seen enough hell to recognize that heavy drumming in the distance.
Someone I never met died. It affected good people. Given the situation, it’s not like I can say anything to help, or even offer my condolences, but I’ve known that pain before, and it makes me want to do something. I wish there was something that could be done, but how do you even try to talk to someone who has just stepped into an entirely different world, an unknown, colder place fraught with unsympathetic eyes and automatons with functions of their own?
People tried, when this sort of thing happened before. Maybe it helps others, sometimes, I don’t know. Maybe it’s something you never really get over. Perhaps you’re not supposed to, but instead we’re meant to carry that pain like a scar, an eternal memory of someone gone. Rough, horrible, and I wouldn’t wish such pain upon my worst enemies. Just as bad and maybe worse, I think, to experience that pain again…and again.
Do you ever wish you had some piece of wisdom to offer, something that will bring understanding to those who need it so desperately? I do, more often than I care to think about. The sad truth is I have no wisdom…especially when it comes to death. I don’t know why it happens, not really, and I can’t tell you for certain what it is to die. I do know that a good man is no longer with us, and I’m sure that his presence will be sorely missed.
It’s not my place to speak on this subject. Indeed, I don’t even know if my feelings will be accepted, or if these words shall be seen as an intrusion, into a world in which I have no place. If so, so be it…these are my thoughts, and I present them only for your consideration, not your approval. Shalom.
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